Are there pizza menus sticking out of your junk drawer? Chinese menus stuck to your fridge? Menus you grabbed from various restaurants you keep meaning to try filed away somewhere never to be seen again except by your heirs? 

Pitch them and lighten up the junk drawer because everything's online now and you can store numbers in your phone. So, how many menus do you need? Zip. 

The first part of this answer is easy: enough to keep the kids occupied so you can read in peace, or take a shower alone, or just hear yourself think for five damn minutes without somebody yelling "mom!" or crying or fighting or bleeding or stuffing socks down the toilet - but not enough toys to make a mess. Right?

The second part of this answer is also easy: you need quiet toys, building toys, creative toys, thinking toys, musical toys, and imagination toys because this is what you want your kids to grow up learning. And books. But don't forget that back in the day kids had way, way, way fewer toys and were thus forced/encouraged to use their imagination and creativity to find things to do instead of relying on cheap plastic crap made in China and enriching the Chinese government so that one day they can Take Over The World. Oh my. Where did that come from? 

Now comes the hard part: how many, where do they go, and who puts them away? Easiest first:

Q: Who puts the toys away?
A: Why, whoever uses them of course, because...of course. I cross my heart promise you that if you start and enforce this one simple habit for the first five years of your child's life, you will save yourself years of pain and suffering. Years. A decade or two. Even longer if your kids God forbid end up in your basement after college. 

Teach your children to put things away as soon as they can hold an object in their hand and walk, crawl, or drag themselves across the floor to the shelf/box/bag/tub/whatever. Make it a game. Join in the "fun" every time at first, and then again as needed.

Be consistent.

This will work.

However — and it's a big however — accept the fact that one day oh so soon the "fun" of clean-up time will just plumb wear out because...it just does. Eventually you'll most likely need to add a consequence for those times the darlings don't feel like putting things away. The secret to peaceful clean-up times is to have your consequence thought out in advance and to Stay Calm. Calm. Very calm. Very matter-of-fact: if this, then that, it's just the way it is. For example: If you don't want to put your toy away, then you won't be able to play with it next time so I'm putting it way up here. Then, next time they ask for it, remind them that it's out of reach because they didn't want to put it away and that maybe tomorrow they can play with it again if they put their toys away today. Calm. It's not a punishment, it's a consequence, a choice your child made. Don't get angry, don't raise your voice, don't threaten or beg or cajole. And if they never ask for that toy again? Well, cool. One less thing to take up space and clean up after. 

Q: Where do the toys go? 
A: In the easiest, closest, tidiest places possible. If you expect a small child to stack up the blocks neatly down the hall in the closet, rather than tossing them in a bin right there, you'll be eating dinner at midnight, if ever. 

Depending on the layout of your home, you may have one play area or several. Young kids want to be near mom and dad, meaning you'll want a few items in whatever rooms you're typically in. While it would be oh so lovely to have matching bins and cubbies and shelves, it's not necessary. Every year or so most of the toys will change anyway as kids move up in skill level, meaning you'll constantly be figuring out what bin, what size, what shelf will fit what toy. The only "rule" is to keep like with like; which teaches your kids basic organizational skills. Use a low basket on the floor for crawlers. Low shelves or bins for toddlers. They need to be able to see the toys, reach them, and put them away all by themselves.

Q: How many toys do you need? 
A: Fewer than you probably think. For toddlers and preschoolers with a designated playroom, maybe start with five "activity" items in that room. Choose things that have a longer interest factor: Legos, bricks, blocks, puzzles, cars and trucks, dollhouses, barns, coloring, and other items that require creativity, encourage making things up, and can expand and grow. Put a couple books in their bedroom; one or two (not ten) items in the tub; big cardboard bricks in the laundry area; a few low cupboards in the kitchen so they can empty and rearrange while you're working. Rotate other toys in and out as their interests change. Pay attention to what your child really gets into and start by feeding that. See what they ignore or toss aside and pull these items out from the rotation. Always, always store some items away so you can bring them out for days of desperation, car trips, restaurants, quiet time. 

So what do you do if you read this post too late and you already own 3,246 toys, ​

This will be a quick project. Won't take any time at all. Couldn't be easier. You'll be out of here in five minutes or so because there is just one question and one simple reference back to the times tables.

Ready? 
 
How many people are in your household? (We'll take care of guest glasses later.) Now multiply that number by two. Tada! There's your answer! One glass is in use for the day and the other one is either in the cupboard or waiting to be washed. Done and done. See, wasn't that easy? You're welcome.

Wait, what?

You say that people in your home want a clean glass every time they get a drink?

But, um. doesn't that mean your sink and/or dishwasher and/or countertops are constantly filled with dirty cups? Doesn't that require - correct me if I'm wrong - a mass assortment of drinking implements meaning that your cabinet is overflowing with big cups, little cups, travel cups, travel cups without lids, plastic, glass, BPA-free cups, not to mention God knows how many of those plastic cups with logos? All so your little loved ones can use however many cups their little hearts desire?

And you're OK with this?

Because there is another way to live and it's fairly easy to get to. 

First, teach the kids how to rinse out their cup. Keep a step stool by the sink.  A half decent rinse works just fine; the cups will be fully washed at some point, besides a few germs never hurt anybody. Rinsing your own cup is the foundation of reducing kitchen clutter and mess, 

Then choose a place where the kids can put their rinsed cups until the next time they need them: in the drainer maybe, or on the counter next to the water perhaps.

It will take about 21 days of enforcing this for it to click and for the kids to rinse on their own. Don't give up. Stick with it. Don't get angry. You can do it rah rah! After all, you have years of cups ahead of you. Years and years and years. Set the precedent now. 

Here's how:

1. Gather up all your drinking glasses - not bar, wine, or martini glasses - unless you're going to imbibe while you work - and not water bottles, travel mugs, or thermoses. Just ordinary every day water/milk/juice/whatever drinking glasses. Grab them from the dishwasher, the sink, under beds, wherever they are, dirty or clean. Spend a minute alone with them. Take a pic if you want to share. 

2. If you have a baby or toddler, pull out the top two cups you like/use the most. Put those cups in the cup cabinet and push the remaining baby/toddler cups to the side.You are not discarding anything at this moment. I mention this because you look pale and the shallow breathing and racing heart that occur with panic is not healthy. Relax. For now, the cups aren't going anywhere. 

3. For the rest of the family, decide if matching is important. If so, pull out all the matching that you have. Are there 2 per family member? Move these to the cupboard. If you don't have enough matching, decide if you want to get some. (They're $1 each at Goodwill, and I've found super high quality ones there.) If matching isn't important, grab two glasses for each family member and move these to the cabinet. Push all the rest over to your These-Aren't-Going-Anywhere (TAGA for short) pile. 

4. Now for those plastic logo cups. I'm not even going to get into microplastics though I will mention that many smart people believe plastic around our food and drink can be harmful. Just saying. That said, I have four plastic logo cups for taking to the neighbor's pool, up on the roof patio, or just hanging outside. I chose our favorite logo cups, the ones that have special memories. Well, as special as plastic logo cup memories can be. Let your spouse and each child choose their own two logo cups and let everyone agree that if they bring home a new one, they'll have to get rid of one. Add these to the cabinet. Move the rest to the TAGA pile.

5. Now for the guests, including kids' friends. Only you can decide how many extra drinking glasses you'll need on hand for guests. How many people do you typically have at a time? How many kids needing drinks? Do the kids need unbreakable? Take the time to think this through because it is sooooo tempting to just give up and jam everything back into the cabinet. Figure out your numbers. Would 12 guest drinking glasses work for 75% of the gatherings you hold? 24? Pick the number, then put these glasses on a higher shelf or in the next cabinet because of this universally-acknowledged  truth: If guest glasses are in the rotation of available glasses, family members will use them. They can't help it bless their souls. And boom! you'll be right back to clutter and dirty dishes.

Repeat the process for whatever cups your kids' friends will use. Put them up high or in the next cabinet. Then when kids come over, you can move the cups down or the kids can use a step stool.  

6. What's left on the counter? Are there one or two cups or glasses so filled with meaning that you would lay down and die rather than get rid of? Can you find another use for them? I have colored pencils, markers, pens, etc in an assortment of favorite chipped/unusable/extra cups. Repurpose if you can't let them go. 

7. Get rid of the extra: 
Option 7a:. Get 'er done 
Box everything up right now before the kids and spouse get home and put in your car. 
   
Option 7b: Better safe than sorry 
Box everything up and store the box somewhere out of reach, then wait. If no one cries or whines or complains over the next two weeks, then sell or donate items.

Be strong. Don't be tempted to keep a bunch of cups just in case. That's exactly how cups start multiplying. It's dark in that cabinet, and boring. There's probably lots of cup hanky panky going on because how else do we end up with so many $@!%& cups? 

There was a time when the only hangers I used were free ones. So I understand if this how you must and/or choose to live. However, this doesn't mean you need to hang on to every dang hanger that comes your way, does it?  And those wire hangers from the dry cleaners? Shudder. They are not doing your clothes any favors. You can just tell by looking at the droopy arms, the saggy neckline, and those sad shoulder indentations that these clothes have lost their will to live. Please, if you care about your clothes, give them some decent hangers. Spend the money on quality and then take care of them and you'll never have to buy hangers again. BTW: while Goodwill says they throw out wire hangers, most cleaners are happy to take them back. 

As to how many hangers you need, that's an easy one: Enough to hang up your clothes.

Oh, but what about the new clothes you'll be buying, you ask? That's an entirely different post but spoiler alert: (1.) you probably have way too many clothes already; (2.) when you bring a new item in,  you should send an old one out; and (3.) we don't have to follow every fad and fancy the fashion industry seduces us with do we? They've made lots of mistakes you know: earth shoes, padded shoulders, Peter Pan collars for women over 9. 

There is actual joy to be found right there in your closet when your clothes hang proudly on supportive hangers, preferably matching (I'm not there yet), and with room to breath between each item. Joy, I tell you. 

It's true that belt styles come and go, meaning those 12 outdated belts in your closet could easily come back in style in...oh, two decades perhaps. But for the most part, don't you wear the same belts over and over? 

I only own one belt because my wardrobe needs are Super Simple. But. Maybe you have/need more. If so, here's the plan.
​

1. Gather all belts into a pile.

2. Pull out any that don't fit because if you were going to gain or lose the weight required to fit the belt, surely you'd have done it by now, right?

3. Pull out any you simply don't like and that make you cringe. Keeping these is just bad juju. 

4. Pull out any you haven't worn in a year because come on, if you haven't worn them you do you need them? See: "Seriously? You're KEEPING THAT?"  or "So what? The money's already SPENT."

5. Keep what's left, sell or donate the rest.

Well that was a cinch, right? Hahaha.